It’s been a while
since we last met.
So long
that you’re simply
a distant memory to me.
A stranger.
Your facial features
long lost
amongst the many other memories
of our distant past
even though we are bound
by blood.
The cards in my hands
felt soft
squishy almost.
I wiped the sweat
off my palms.
There was a gap.
A disconnect between us.
Memories buried for years on end
left to fade away.
The room soon filled with banter.
Still, silence between us.
I remained a distance soul
scared that time itself
had torn us too far apart.
Each on our own boat
floating further and further away
lost within the ocean of life.
We were the only ones left
You and I.
The chatter softened
and soon
silence enveloped the room.
Cards began to fly between us
faster, faster, faster.
I want to win.
Our hands grabbed for more cards
as the seconds flew by.
Flying colors blurred my vision.
At last
we both reached out desperately.
It was over.
I came out empty handed.
I was stunned.
When we both began
to laugh.
One that broke
the 5 years of silence
between us.
One that was long overdue.
And then
memories came flooding back in.
Long nights spent
behind bright, flashing pixels
hushed voices
fantasizing over the vast
virtual world.
A living room
turned wrestling ring
our playful selves determined to prove
who was stronger.
The bridge build between us
created by countless memories
was once again restored.
We were no longer strangers
but family instead.
I love your poem! One poetic device that really sticks out to me is your use of enjambment. I feel like the enjambment really emphasizes the initial melancholia and then the hope of the poem. Also, your use of imagery with metaphors is amazing. Specifically, one of my favorite sets of lines is
ReplyDelete"Our hands grabbed for more cards
as the seconds flew by.
Flying colors blurred my vision."
In general, your poem does a great job of portraying the rollercoaster of emotion that you feel, and any reader can definitely relate to that feeling of disconnect and distance in a relationship.
My favorite device you used was enjambment as it really slowed the poem down and made me think carefully about the words in the poem. My favorite line was "lost within the ocean of life." I thought that that line made the poem seem bigger despite how the poem is about a friendship between two people. The poem really had a nice transformation, a good arc, a good story to tell.
ReplyDeleteI really liked the line "we were no longer strangers but family instead" at the end of the poem. It brings the poem to a nice, hopeful closing despite the forlorn tone that is present in the first half.
ReplyDeleteI liked the use of short lines because it forces the reader to slow down and appreciate the importance of every single word. My favorite line was "We were no longer strangers but family instead" because it is such a satisfying end.
ReplyDelete